yesterday Nori passed away.
Actually, I had an appointment yesterday afternoon at the veterinarian with her (she should get a restorative injection to support her recovery), but as I came home from work she was already gone.
She lied there in her small house. She looked so peaceful. I guess she died while she was sleeping.
The evening before, Nori was quite powerless and I tried to fed her with all those things she used to love - but she didn't wanted to eat anything. I will never forget the expression in her eyes as she laid in my arms and then looked at me: It was a mixture of helplessness and gratefulness. In some way it looked like she would like to say: "My time has come, its okay" Those big, lovely eyes. I cried a lot this evening though Nori was there still alive. I guess, my subconscious mind knew that she would go.
I really had such a positive feeling back at the weekend that she will make it and will be completely recovering, but now I know that this was a delusion. I thought that the surgery would be a chance for Nori to a bit more longer life. If I didn't had agreed to the surgery she would have died in a week also because the tumour would've been grown that much that she wouldn't be able to move and/or eat/drink anymore so that in the end we should had to put her to sleep.
In the moment, its diffcult for me to handle with it and I guess it would take even a bit more time. I wish I had stayed by Nori in her last moments. I really feel so sorry and in some way guilty, too. Even though tears and thoughts will not bring her back again, I can't stop crying and thinking about Nori and all the precious time we had together. Im really thankful that we had more than 2 years together, Nori became 2 years and 11 weeks old. This is really a quite impressive age for a fancy rat.
At midday today we laid Nori to her final rest (thank you mum for staying by me there). It may sounds childish but I'd given Nori in her final fluffy sleeping place also her favourite candy and a "farewell letter" with - it is a ritual I simply just can't break. Above Nori's grave a beautiful flower now will bloom. Nori herself really looked so beautiful just like she would be still alive, really so very beautiful. If it were up to me alone, I preferably would have hold her for even more time - to be honest, I refused to believe that she is gone. I know its stupid. So, Im "happy" that she now has arrived her final sleeping place. I believe that she is gone to a better world now - to the "Pet Palace in Heaven" <3 .
But, I do not want to think about Nori and get sad every time, I want to remember all those lovely and funny things with her. I guess Nori would like it this way, too.
Nori was such a lovely rat. She loved to ate which you could also easily see. Eventhough Nori was a bit jumpy she was also a really nosy rat. I couldnt resist her cute big wide eyes. A shy and greedy beauty! <3
Thank you for the precious time we had! <3
|Nori and the crunchy tunnel|
|Nori in her "nest-building"-mode|
|Nori is drinking|
|Peachy wants to clean Nori|
|Nori in her loved rustle-box|
|Nori as 6-weeks-old rat|
Nori, Nou-Nou, Norilein, Nori-Chan... <3
we will never forget you!
*07.02.2010 - †24.04.2012
*07.02.2010 - †24.04.2012
Rest In Peace